A penchant for setting up situations that put me on the run;
A distinct inability to bounce back
From both personal and justified attacks;
Of responsibility or
Desire to face the poor
Decisions that put me in the poor house;
A tendency to comply when crying friends say, “Ignore us.”
A bad habit of sniffing Krazy Glue
Then taking my boots off and stomping around the chicken coop;
An effected detachment from reality
Guaranteed by liberal application of low-volume TV
As the background noise and color of a much larger, more important scheme
And enjoy approximately 12 hours of wine-and-rum dreams.
A pair of bruised and bloody knees
Garnered from a day of hard work of falling to them to please—
Well, everyone, it seems.
Not that they ever asked me for subservience
Or even courtesy in any way;
That's just the kind of guy I am, I'd say.
Difficulty finding topics of conversation that don't bore,
And/or people whose first instinct when I talk isn't to snore;
Furthermore, difficulty enjoying conversation myself
(Unless it's about how I prefer poultry to shellfish).
I don't think that makes me selfish, but
I'd say I'm a loner since instead of talking with potential friends I'd rather stay home reading Homer.
Use of big words where they don't solicitously apply
Just in case someone gets the idea that I'm not the smartest thing alive.
The labels I affix
To both myself and others who might then find that they and their assignments don't mix.
For instance, the way I've spelled out my problem to you with the intent
Of getting some relief from it—
But you're not a doctor, are you?